I’m contemplating writing a series of how marathon training has helped with my wellness. If so, this is part 1, if not, this is a blog post.
It’s no secret that I’m not great with the whole…interacting with people thing …
But through my training, I have been pushing myself more than just physically. I have been forcing myself to wave and say good morning to everyone that I see. It’s not much because, well there aren’t a lot of people out at 5 am, but every person that I pass (within reason, there are a few sketchy neighborhoods that I run through). It’s not making me any more friends (but I have always been in the quality over quantity group), but it forces me to interact with people more, to build confidence.
Who knew that marathon training could boost ones social wellness?
Way back when I first started up this bad boy blog of mine, my friend Kalyn gave me the suggestion to write about how to meet new people and make friends when you move some place new. Probably because I am 26 and since I was 18, I have moved every year and lived in 3 different states. One thing that I realized last week as I was running to run club was that you kind of have to put yourself out there and get involved. And beyond that, when someone makes the effort, you have to make the effort as well. Which for someone like me who is insanely introverted, this is really difficult and nerve wracking. But honestly, there really isn’t a good way to do that. Sometimes in life, you just have to be uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable like you feel like your life is in danger, but you know what I am saying. To grow you have to challenge yourself. And sometimes it is taking tiny challenges but at some point you just have to take a leap.
But like…be safe. I know I can sit here and tell you to get uncomfortable and challenge yourself, but that’s a general suggestion. You have to know YOU and you have to be the one that makes decision. By the time I started going to run club, I knew someone that I was going with and I wasn’t in danger. When I got invited to a community dinner, I knew a few people there and I knew where I was at. Don’t take my advice and do something that actually gets you danger. I don’t know why I am adding this disclaimer…but I think it is important to know that when you are in a new place and you don’t know many (if any) people, that you are responsible for making sure that you are safe. Make sense?
Today is my sister’s birthday! She sometimes reads this blog, so feel free to leave her some loving in the comments 🙂
My sister and I are 28 months apart, her being older and wiser than I. Since I was a little kid, my sister has always been a role model and a source of inspiration for me. She has always been someone that holds herself very well and is highly determined and motivated. It was my sister that first suggested we run a half-marathon together and it was my sister who gave me the push to start running. My sister always set the bar high for success. She is truly one of the most gorgeous human beings, inside and out, that I know. Through everything in her life, she has always been so poised and just elegant. She’s a gracious and humble woman. Her laugh is infectious and she has a smile and presence that always lights up any room. She’s more than just her looks, she is extremely intelligent as well and has a work ethic that is unmatched by most people I know. She is truly one of the strongest people I have ever met in my life.
Happy Birthday Victoria!
I spent some time back in my home state this past weekend (and subsequently ended up catching a 24 hour bug/flu). But before that I got to spend some quality time with my family and das boy as well. I ended up taking das boy up to my home state and showed him where I grew up and where I went to under grad. I got to introduce him to a few people and whatnot.
But then when we got back to our respective homes, I ended up getting really sick. So that kind of tainted my otherwise lovely weekend and mini vacation with das boy. I’m recovering and feeling better, but I’m still iffy. I haven’t had anything in me really for the past 24 hours or at least anything that I can keep down. I ended up drinking a powerade last night and was able to keep that down and so now I need to work on re-hydrating myself and getting some actual food in me.
Do you ever have those moments when you wonder “what if”? Of course, most people do. But what about those moments when you know that there is no what if, there is only action? Especially when their are friends involved? I got the joy of experiencing one of those moments this weekend while visiting in Kentucky. My main reason why I came back was because one of my old roommate got married this weekend plus it had been over a year since I left Kentucky and I missed my friends back in Kentucky. Anyway, while I was at the wedding and the reception was winding down and my other old roommate and I were getting ready to leave, the bride stopped by and expressed her genuine thanks for me traveling from Kansas to Kentucky for her wedding. There was never really a time when I thought, “oh I’m not going to go” but it was at that exact moment when I was recognized that there was never a what if question. I was going to be there at her wedding no matter what. And I recognize that we don’t always have that feeling when making a decision. We sometimes think that the decision we are making is the right one and realize that it wasn’t.
But I had more what if questions that I pondered while I was back. I wondered what my life would be like had I stayed in Kentucky-what job would I be working, what friends would I have, where would I live? But what good does asking what if do? What good does dwelling on a decision do? I think on one hand you can say that asking those what if questions could create a learning opportunity but on the other hand you just dwell on a decision that you cannot change.
What does what if have to do with social wellness? Not much, but this picture does
Congrats to Beth and Ross! And big thanks to Meghan for letting me crash on her couch and driving me around everywhere!
So in all the craziness that has been going on in my life, I have completely forgotten that I will be in Kentucky next week! I did my master’s degree in Kentucky and I am going back because one of my old roommates is getting married. Which means I also get to go back and reconnect with the people that helped me find my passion in wellness. I will be seeing old professors and my old co-workers and just in general getting to go back to a state which I associate a lot of happiness with.
It’s important to make time for the people in your life that have made an impact. It’s important to let those people know how much you appreciate them being in your life and having that positive impact. I am definitely guilty of neglecting those relationships but it is important as you move forward in your life and your career, that you remember some of those people that helped you get there. People grow apart and things change, but even a simple Facebook wall post/message can be really nice just to let them know you were thinking of them. It would be crazy to think that you will remain close friends with everyone that you have been friends with throughout your life but it is always nice when you get a “blast from the past” and touch base with someone you were once close with. I’ll admit that I feel like I struggle a lot with holding on to friends and I second guess myself when friends stop talking to me. So perhaps it means more to someone like me to hear from an old friend.
Basically the point of this post is that I’m going to be in Kentucky next week and you should (whoaaaaaaaaa! did I really just say the “s” word?) make time to reach out to an old friend and just do a quick “check-in”.
I’m not really sure what spurred this post more. The angry hate that I read online after the USA announced their world’s team, the angry hate that I read about the Miss America pageant. The angry hate that I read about everyday from people sitting behind their computers thinking that because they are behind their computer they can throw away the golden rule and can say whatever they want without having any ramifications. Or an accumulation of it all. I grew up in a different era. I grew up in an era where computers will still a rising trend and when the internet made a funny “dialing” sound. I didn’t grow up having my identity protected by my computer. When I said something nasty about another girl I went to school with, I had to deal with the consequences. Which usually meant me having to apologize, face to face, and getting an angry lecture from my mom.
But I see more and more everyday just how horrible people can be when their identity is hidden behind a username and location is unknown. They can say whatever they wish. They can rip apart your looks, your brain, your personality, your family, your friends, your life. And never face any consequences because of it. Perhaps it is because I read the message boards on the “gymnternet” which tears piece by piece every gymnast from every country apart. From the leotards that they wear to their body to that one look (and no I am not just talking about McKayla Maroney) that they made for one second that just happened to get captured and now is everywhere on the internet.
Another reason that spurred this post is all the complete disrespect and hate that the new Miss America is getting for being Indian. While I do not agree with her winning (not because of her race, but because I hate how the answer section is scored-you get more points for dancing around the question and being a politician than you do for having an actual opinion and values and sticking to it. Case in point Minnesota obviously values marriage and believe that if you get married, you stay married so when asked her question, instead of dancing around the question and being political about it, she answered with her opinion. She got 4th runner up. Other contestants, like California that sort of answered the questions but not really, placed higher. THAT’S my issue with Miss America.) I do not condone the hate that this woman has received just based on her race. There are very few things in life that will spur me to take the energy to actually argue with someone and immigration is one of those things. I am a first gen kid right here. You wouldn’t guess it by looking at me because my family is from Germany, but I am a first gen. I watched as my mom struggled with the English language and I was in the courtroom when she became a US citizen. So when people want to get on their high horses about “if you can’t speak English or you’re not American get the F*@% out of our country,” I tend to get a little feisty. Anyway, where was I? Oh right, quit hiding behind your keyboard and hating on people!
Is it time that we start teaching the internet how to have some common decency? Or is it time that we start teaching ourselves to have a thicker skin?
Regardless, I’m definitely
with how people have forgotten how to treat others.