I was reading through some top wellness news hits (and this is admittedly kind of late seeing as this article was written 6/11/13) and came across this HuffPo article, Life Is too Short: 10 Things to Stop Tolerating. And as I was reading, like I do w/ most lists like this, I started thinking about what my 10 things were. (One thing to keep in mind when you are reading lists like this is that they are based on a general consensus. There will be something things that apply to you and others that don’t. I like to think of these lists as a jumping ground of what my own list is).
So I present to you, Vanessa’s 10 Things to Stop Tolerating List (I’ll note the ones that are the same from the HuffPo article). And really, mine are in no particular order.
10.) Keeping up with the Joneses (from HP): this is one that has taken probably the worst financial toll on my life. Throughout college I was obsessed with keeping up with my friends and roommates who were always buying new things, designer things, had big closets, ate out for every meal, etc. Since then, I have been able to see more of the value in my spending and making sure that I am being more conscious about it. I participated in a financial wellness presentation at my grad school and learned a lot from the speaker about financial wellness. I also started dating das boy who happens to be an ace at being cautious with this spending. Life is too short to try and keep up with a lifestyle of excessive spending. It adds too much stress and doesn’t fulfill me at all.
9.) The “Shoulds”: I have admittedly chosen a “different” life path than most. I say “different” because I have no desire to get married or reproduce. I don’t want to. And I can’t tell you how many times over the years of me saying this people have told me I will change my mind and when I meet the right guy everything will change. Because getting married and having offspring is what I should be wanting to do with my life. No one even took the time to listen to my argument or my side that maybe the right guy for me wouldn’t want any of those things either. Maybe it is ok to not want those things. Maybe it is ok to want those things (the majority of my friends have at least married, some have reproduced). But maybe we need to stop putting shoulds on people’s shoulders and let people decide what they want to do with their life. You can read more about my thoughts of should HERE.
8.) Stressing Out and Being Disorganized (combined two from HP): I combined these two because for me being disorganized leads to stress. When my office is a mess, I get stressed out more easy. When my apartment is a mess, when my day isn’t organized…I am someone that needs and values organization in my life. I like schedules. I like routine. And there is nothing wrong with that. I get stressed out when things don’t go as planned. Since I know this about myself, I try to schedule things out. Even with my vacation, I have scheduled relaxation times, scheduled times to work on this blog, scheduled times to go have fun, etc.
7.) Holding Grudges: life is too short to continue to be mad at someone and to be hateful. Those of you that know me personally may start to point a finger and say, “But Vanessa, what about…” and to that I respond with that I don’t hold a grudge against this person. I have come to terms with what has happened and I’m letting myself let go. I’m not forgiving but what happened was unforgivable in my eyes, but I’m letting go of the anger and hurt that I feel from that. Because life is too short to be angry all the time.
6.) Being Miserable: (combined a bunch from HP) life is WAAAY to short to spend too much time being sad, depressed, and/or miserable. Way too short. Sometimes it’s hard to get out of a situation that makes you miserable. But you can do things that make you happy until you can get it. For me, the apartment I live in right now is terrible (every time I say “terrible” I think of Frank Calliendo impersonating Charles Barkley…”that was turrble”) but I can’t just get out of that situation right away without having to pay an insane amount of money. Which doing that would make me even more miserable. So I found a new place to live to get excited about and every time I kill a massive cricket in my apartment, I think about my new place that I will be moving too soon. Some situations that you are miserable in can be fixed much faster. The point is, life is too short to spend the majority of your time feeling like crap.
5.) Love: life is too short to not love someone. Whether it is family, friends, significant other, a pet…life is just too short to not get to experience what love is (both giving love and receiving love). Life is too short to not have people in your life that you love and that love you.
4.) Do Something You Love (adapted from HP): whether it is your actual job or it is a hobby. Plain and simple. Life is waaaaay too short to not get do follow your passions and do something that makes you happy. (This is actually why I started this blog. I love wellness and wanted the chance to get to do something every single day that excites me. And that truly is blogging about wellness).
3.) Alone Time: learning to be ok by yourself and being alone is something that I really think is very valuable. Not to be pessimistic, but there won’t always be someone with you all the time. And getting that alone time and placing value on it (instead of dreading it) can be a really valuable thing. Whether it is letting yourself just think during a solo run or even going to a restaurant alone to eat. Having alone time is something that is really great and sometimes overlooked.
2.) Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone: Get out there. Seriously. Do something that scares the life out of you. I picked up my life and moved to Kentucky for grad school where I didn’t know a single soul. Not one person in the entire state. And to this day it is still one of the greatest things I have ever done. I learned more about myself in the two years that I lived in Kentucky than I did in all of high school and college. I did something scary. I wasn’t always the best at it but I did it. And honestly, I am a stronger and better person because of it.
1.) Be Healthy (from HP): I have spent a lot of my life not being healthy, which comes as a shock to some people. But I have battled my demons and I can tell you, at 25, life is too short to not value your health. Find a physical exercise that excites you. Experiment with cooking healthy foods. Surround yourself with people that value health. Don’t beat yourself up. Value your health.
What are some of the items on your list? Anything major that I missed? Let me know in the comments below! Or you can tweet me, like my facebook page, or send me an email (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Have a great weekend!